Dancing for the Guiness Book of Records In A Field In Co. Kildare

www.antoniarolls.co.uk for my website
www.jesusonthetube.co.uk for my other website and best known of my images
www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for the A Graceful Death exhibition, paintings from the end of life

Dancing In A Field In Co. Kildare

Of course sending a text saying "Am in a field in Co. Kildare breaking a record for the Guiness Book of Records" to Furiously Independent Son in London was up on his facebook page in no time as something like "Just had a text from my mum who is dancing in a field in Kildare for some Guiness".  It got quite a few ha ha it's in the genes comments.  Interesting, everyone knows I don't drink alcohol at all, that I have very wittily been labelled teatotal for all the tea that I do drink.  I expect I am good for Furious Independent Son's reputation there.

I am in Dublin again, in the bosom of the family of my Darling Dublin Friend.  Eileen, Photographer Extraordinaire and I came out last week and have settled with purrs of pleasure into the life of this lovely family here.  One of the items on the list for our stay was to go with DDF's children to a field in Co Kildare with nearly 500 other jolly folk, and do the biggest rain dance ever to break the current record in the Guiness Book of Records.  Naturally, we broke the world record, despite about 40 people being disqualified for putting their arms down too soon, and I left the field with a teeshirt and a wee certificate.  Lovely.  I like to break the odd world record if I can, during my stays with friends. 

Eileen and I met when we were 19 years old in Aberdeen, during the first week of University there.  Two such unlikely people as Eileen and I would never have been a dead cert to meet and be pals for life by the bookies before that first week in Aberdeen.  And yet, we sat next to each other for our first lecture in History of Art, looked at each other, were astonished and curious, and have not left each other's side since.  I remember Eileen had such white white hands, and she remembers that I had very whacky red clothes.  I asked Eileen if she powdered her hands, and she was intrigued enough by such a strange question, that we carried on from there.  A little later DDF came on the scene.  It is funny to think how affected we were at the sight of someone at University who seemed so together, so Arty and so In The Crowd.  DDF belonged to the Drama Society.  She did the costumes, and wore black with style.  And she made her own clothes - I thought she was wonderful.  My first meeting with DDF was on a coach from Aberdeen to some London Demo.  DDF wore a woollen jumper of multi coloured stripes, in such wonderful shades of yellow, red, green, orange, blue that I was unable to stop looking at her.  And them, in her gentle Yorkshire voice, she mentioned that she had knitted it herself.  In the presence of genuis, I thought, bow low.  Well, 31 years later we are still happy together and having a gentle holiday to celebrate Eileen's birthday in DDF's home in Dublin with her Husband, the Nicest Man in Ireland and his family, and the children. 

DDF is very creative.  She can make something out of anything, so to speak.  She can sew, design, create and make it all look as if she did it when she had a few moments to spare in between answering the telephone and picking up the kiddies.  She is great to go to the shops with, as her eye for quality and potential is extraordinary.  And Eileen, who is such a fabulous photographer and I, love to browse and meander in shops and markets, feeling the cloth and dreaming of buying chandeliers (that is me, I want chandeliers).  Eileen carries her very state of the art photographic equipment with her and takes shots of people and items and scenes that catch her fancy.  I went to a large public garden in West Sussex with my old friend Michael and Eileen, once.  Michael and I wandered around the garden, Eileen  wanted to go off on her own.  Michael and I kept hearing rustles in the shrubbery and flower beds as we walked.  Fear not, we said to each other.  It is not lions and tigers and bears, it is probably Eileen settling in for a fabulous close up shot of a teeny weeny rare flower.  And so it probably was.  DDF, Eileen and I  make a wonderful trio, we all look very different and we all come from different parts of the UK - Eileen from Norther Ireland, DDF from Scotland and me from Petworth in the posh South of England.  We have different lives and different creative directions but we all speak the same language.  We share a history, a past, and know how we all think.  In short, we are good for each other and love spending time together.  We clear our minds for each other, talk things over about what to do next in our artistic lives and understand exactly how difficult things can be. 

Last evening, we sat around DDF's kitchen table, in the house she and her husband designed and had made in the grounds of the In Law's house, and chatted late and drank tea. I can't even remember what we said but today I know I am OK, DDF is OK and Eileen is OK.  We can all do our Artistic Stuff, we can all take the next step, we are all fine. 

Of course, soon as I get home I will be struck by how dirty my windows are and how shabby the paint work is.  I will wonder how on earth I can be nice to all three of my kids all of the time while trying to rock the world with my art.  I will long for Alan to come and whisk me away to Greece or France on a holiday but fret about spending the time away and I will have to buy a new hoover as my old one broke before I came here.  Goddam.

But Peace!  I have been to Dublin and all is right with the world!  I am safe in the arms of my friends and so I can do my thing. 

I am coming back with Furiously Independent Son next month too, to celebrate his birthday.  That blog will be utterly different.  It will be "Goodness me, how did this happen?  Goodness me, I didn't know my son did that.  Heavens - I used to pick that child up with one hand and now look at him!  No, he suits a beard.  Perhaps we should put the Guiness away..."

In Recovery. Happy, Successful and Comatose

www.antoniarolls.co.uk for my website
www.jesusonthetube.co.uk for one of the best known of my images, Jesus being ignored while on a tube train
www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for the A Graceful Death exhibition, paintings from the end of life

In Recovery - Happy, Successful and Comatose

This weekend, the Glorious Clarissa and I sold enough Angels to make God sit up and take notice.  We sold enough Fairies to populate a Fairy Rave Up and enough earrings to make every lady who bought them a work of art herself.  The Cakes - they always sell, and goodness me we did a brisk trade in large slices of Upside Down Cake, Boiled Fruit Cake, Lemon Drizzle, Chocolate, Chocolate and Smartie, and Flapjacks.  Mrs Smith made and donated the most exquisite sparkly cup cakes to the sale, and lent us her fancy cup cake display thing.  Of course, quite rightly, these cup cakes were worshipped by everyone before they were bought, and then they worried about eating them because they were so very beautiful.  A certain part of London is now a stone heavier, which no one will notice because of the astonishing brightly coloured earrings they (or their wives) are wearing.  I am happy to say that all of you who came have enabled me to cover the costs of the next A Graceful Death exhibition in Birmingham in November.  Thank you.

So.  When I come to do a show anywhere I come with an Army.  Antonia Rolls does not arrive quietly and set up a tiny display of sensitive and meaningful items in the corner while no one is looking.  She does not say, "Don't mind me, I'll be gone soon," as she tries not to get in the way.  I come with a car stuffed with Art and cakes and so on.  Banners, cards, candles for atmosphere, flowers, picture hanging stuff, display boards and half eaten sandwiches.  I am usually staying so I have a bag with pyjamas, slippers, books, jumpers (I hate being cold).  I have hammers, nails, fishing string to hang paintings with, I have leaflets, information, prices and painting descriptions.  Sometimes I even have tables and bedding with me.  They are not linked, I don't sleep on the tables I bring. 

And then.  Then the Army.  Here is a general account of Helpers and Advisers that I am lucky to have.  Ready? - 

• The Glorious Clarissa.  Clarissa had twice now allowed me to come into her smart and enormous Wimbledon home and turn it into a gallery.  Clarissa is smart, funny, sassy and kind.  Clarissa is an excellent business woman.  She is great at making people feel welcome, happy and good about themselves.  And she doesn't mind a house bursting with people, she takes it all in her stride and enables everyone to feel at home and part of the show.
• Eileen, the Photographer Extraordinaire.  Eileen is consistently able to organise the exhibitions to make them really shine.  Eileen is always there for me, and despite being extremely busy as a photographer and at work, she comes and helps with total attention and dedication to detail.  Eileen is not afraid to tell me if something doesn't work, and so I trust her judgement even though I hate hearing anything that isn't fulsome praise.
• Alan.  Alan always makes the effort to come from miles away to support in any way he can.  He will go and fetch things that I have forgotten, and he will be very strict about doing things properly.  He chats to people, tells them about the paintings, and promotes the works wonderfully.  He can count up in his head instantly which stops me from making dreadful mistakes adding up purchases.  (Two cards?  That will be £800 please.)
• The Kids.  Subsection A - Alexia, the Daughter.  She came to help with the cakes and teas, setting them all up and using her wit and intelligence to sell everything to everyone.  Alexia can also make all the cakes but didn't this time because she is working and studying full time.  Both.  At once.  Amazing.  
• Subsection B - Costya the Older Son. Costya is the cool style guru.  His first job is to look good and be seen from the right angle. Costya has helped in the past, and when he is in the right frame of mind, will mingle and chat with people and make me sound like God.  He can do this, but he has to be in the Zone.  Otherwise, he comes and often stays where I am staying, coming truly alive when the wine is opened and a meal on its way.  He is excellent for one-to-one chats to members of the public, and if he is not in the Zone, I dread to think what he tells them about his Mum.
• Subsection C - Dimitri the Younger Son.  Dimitri is 14 and needs feeding so he has to be near a Food Source.  He is a lovely soul, kind and clever, interesting and good natured but at 6'3" he tends to fall over his feet.  He is also deaf in one ear and having lost his hearing aid (another will be ready on 6 June), will mishear things and the most cosmic of conversations can take place, where whoever is talking to Dimitri is not sure if he is a genius or certifiable.  Dimitri has profound business ideas where he thinks I should pile 'em high and sell 'em cheap.  Dimitri also needs to stay wherever I am staying, unless someone can have him while I am away.

Here is something to consider, on a different note.  I went to the Mary Howe Centre today for a general health screening and cancer prevention check up.  I had to have a scan of all my organs, while bursting for a wee.  It is necessary, as all of you know, to scan with a full bladder.  (The patient, not the Scanning Nurse).  Recently too, I have been training to work as a volunteer at my local hospice, which interests my Mother no end.  I phoned her after the Mary Howe Check Up today, and told her that I had had a scan with a painfully full bladder.  My Mother is hard of hearing and was stunned that I had had a scan.  Yes, I told her, we all have scans before we speak to the doctor.  What is this?  she said in confusion.  Do all of you have to have scans to work there?  And I realised she thought I was telling her about a training session at the hospice.  She thought I had to be scanned to see that my pancreas and kidneys were in the right place before I could go and make tea for the patients on the wards.  She thought that all volunteers had to have their internal organs checked before they were allowed in.  No no no Mother! I said. And I explained and she was very relieved.  I think she thought that as a visitor to the Hospice she would be expected to prove her liver was not upside down and therefore a threat to everyone inside.

To finish this account, I am terribly tired.  So is Clarissa - we were on our feet with crowds of lovely people from 10am to 9pm all weekend, with no breaks.  I packed up on Sunday night and arrived back home here at 2am.  Oh but it was worth it.  We sold loads, and chatted to everyone, and had a lovely lovely time. And at the raffle, a certain Carmel Suthons won the chocolate biscuit.  When I phoned her to tell her she said, "Crumbs."  And she thanked her parents, her team and all who knew her.  Ha ha. 

A Strawberry Fairy, A Dark Angel, A Long Red Pointy Pepper Fairy, A PMT Angel...

www.antoniarolls.co.uk  for my website

www.jesusonthetube.co.uk for Jesus taking a trip on the London Underground

www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for the A Graceful Death exhibition, paintings from the end of life

If You Don't See Your Dream Fairy or Angel This Weekend, Commission One From Me. 

  Angels, Earrings, Fairies and Cakes by

Antonia Rolls

Strawberry Fairy.  5" x 7"

You are warmly invited to a weekend sale of Paintings, Prints and Handmade Earrings

Wine and Tea and Cakes 

     

Red Pointy Pepper Fairy 5x7"      Dark Angel 5x7"                 Calm Angel 5x7"

 

                                                         

Saturday May 21 10am - 9 pm to

 Sunday May 22 10am - 9 pm

   at

127 Worple Road, Wimbledon SW20

Bath Angel 5 x 7"

 Sale in aid of the A Graceful Death projects, the Film and the Exhibition.

 www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for more information

I aim to have this sale of Angels and Fairies and fun things while also displaying the latest information about the A Graceful Death exhibition and film.  The weekend is about having fun with all of you, with colour, fun, wit and humour, alongside the serious business of raising funds for the A Graceful Death exhibition and film.  

***********************************************************************
 

The A Graceful Death Film Project -

Making a film of the effect an exhibition of paintings of death and the end of life (A Graceful Death, paintings from the end of life) has on those who are involved in the works, and those who come to experience them at exhibitions.   Showing how the exhibition is created and broadcast, and hearing what those who love it say, and those who don't love it, say.  And very significantly, showing how it feels to paint a sitter as they approach the end of their life, or as they face an uncertain future.  A section of the exhibition shows Survivors too, those who have come through illness, or the bereavement process, and are living again.

Click on the link below to see our video and to hear more and to donate to this important work. 

 

http://www.wefund.co.uk/project/graceful-death-film

 ********************************************************************

Well.  What a fun time I have had in the studio.  14 Year Old Son has recovered and gone back to school, and is no longer in pain.  I was terribly pleased that he had penicillin  because that did the trick and it was just bed, sleep and ice cream for a week (only for him) which suited me very well, loving mother that I am.  I could get on obsessively with the pictures, earrings, cakes and all the admin for the sale coming up this weekend in Wimbledon.  To which you are all coming, remember?  You cancelled the in-laws and put the dog in the kennels, remember?  The car has been serviced and filled with petrol (no expense spared) and space created on your sitting room walls for the Angels and Fairies that you are buying - remember?  Good.  As you were.

It has been a singular experience, painting from dawn to midnight.  This is how artists of old must have felt, inspired and focussed with nothing else in their lives but their art.  I have been churning out paintings of Fairies and Angels with enthusiasm.  I need months to really do as many as were in my mind - I never got round to the Aubergine Fairy or the Hysterical Angel.  These that I have done are small, 5" x 7", and are lovely bursts of wit and colour.  If only I didn't have the A Graceful Death to persue (with a passion, it is where my heart is), if only I didn't have to look after the kids and have a life, I could fill exhibition spaces with Mood Angels and Fruit and Vegetable Fairies and drift off into orbit in a gentle swirl of colour and jollity.  Another time, perhaps.

Today I am doing 70 pairs of earrings.  Here is an example -

I have made an earring board with 70 hooks in it which looks great.  14 Year Old Son wished me luck in making 70 pairs of earrings, and I realised that I had made a very ambitious display board that would mean another dawn to midnight splurge of creativity.   I will start with care and precision, matching and loving each bead with the next but by earring 70 I will be wild, furious and obsessive.  On the display board then, the story will be thus: earrings one to thirty two will be nice and thoughtful, made with a customer in mind and very professional.  Earrings thirty three to fifty seven will show signs of stress and eccentricity, they will be long and made of unmatched beads and baubles. Earrings fifty eight to sixty five will be off the wall and a bit alarming with lots of black and maybe hooks at each end and earrings sixty six to seventy will show meltdown and will have bits of teabag, old banana and paracetamol as part of the design.

A RAFFLE! ON SUNDAY EVENING at the Angels and Fairies and Earrings Weekend

 There will be a raffle on Sunday evening, and the prizes are as follows ...I will give you the dream version first and then the real prizes will follow

1.  First prize is my son.  A nice 14 Year Old to feed and get off to school each day and don't forget his boxing gloves.  He comes with another Son and a Daughter but they are self sufficient, living away from home and will only be part time.

2.  Second prize is for you to have the honour of cleaning my house, top to bottom and then do my washing.

3.  Third prize is for you, lucky winner, to make me tea for a whole year, whenever I want it.  And to feed me eggy sandwiches whenever I want them.

OK.  The Real Prizes -

1.  A beautiful framed print of Jesus on the Tube.  Jesus on the Tube is the best known and most popular of my paintings and has a whole website dedicated to it.  Even the Archbishop of Canturbury has his own personalised Jesus on the Tube.  www.jesusonthetube.co.uk for more information.  Photographed by Eileen Rafferty, a superb photographer and print maker

2.  A framed oil painting of cyclamen in a spotty bowl. I  painted this for the sheer love of it, I love plants and flowers and when I have time, I love to paint them.  About 17" x 30".

3.  An Angel or Fairy of your choice - I will paint it and send it to you in the post.

4.  A custom made pair of earrings, you choose the beads and I will make them up for you.

5.  A chocolate biscuit.  Digestive.  Oh boy.

This weekend of Earrings, Angels, Fairies and Cakes is of course, in aid of raising funds and awareness of the A Graceful Death exhibition and film. There will be opportunites to donate to this very important project, and I will be happy to talk with you about what it all means, what I am doing and where it is all going.  And in the meantime, come - buy Fairies, buy Angels, buy Earrings and buy the yummiest cakes to have with your cups of tea (or wine if it all gets too much). 

Come anyway, and you are warmly welcome.  I look forward to seeing you.

Fairies, Angels and Tonsillitis.

www.antoniarolls.co.uk for my website
www.jesusonthetube.co.uk for my other website (Jesus being ignored on a tube train.  Very good - have a look)
www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for the A Graceful Death exhibition, paintings from the end of life

Fairies, Angels and Tonsillitis

I am delighted to introduce you to some Fairies which I will put into the invite below.  These Fairies have been made while my dear 14 Year Old Son has been smitten by the Tonsil Fairy and given Tonsillitis.  Poor Son, he is very poorly and can only eat ice cream and feel the pain.  It is a very nasty thing, and I am so sorry him.  But, I have cancelled everything and have more time to paint fairies.  So out of blackness comes light.  Out of pain comes paint.  Read on...

 Angels, Earrings, Fairies and Cakes by

Antonia Rolls

Tomato Fairy.  5" x 7"

You are warmly invited to a weekend sale of Paintings, Prints and Handmade Earrings

Wine and Tea and Cakes 

     

Banana Fairy 5x7"                                     Carrot Fairy 5x7"              Daisy Fairy 5x7"

Saturday May 21 10am - 9 pm to

 Sunday May 22 10am - 9 pm

   at

127 Worple Road, Wimbledon SW20

Cup Cake Fairy 5 x 7"

 Sale in aid of the A Graceful Death projects, the Film and the Exhibition.

 www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for more information

I aim to have this sale of Angels and Fairies and fun things while also displaying the latest information about the A Graceful Death exhibition and film.  The weekend is about having fun with all of you, with colour, fun, wit and humour, alongside the serious business of raising funds for the A Graceful Death exhibition and film.  

***********************************************************************
 

The A Graceful Death Film Project -

Making a film of the effect an exhibition of paintings of death and the end of life (A Graceful Death, paintings from the end of life) has on those who are involved in the works, and those who come to experience them at exhibitions.   Showing how the exhibition is created and broadcast, and hearing what those who love it say, and those who don't love it, say.  And very significantly, showing how it feels to paint a sitter as they approach the end of their life, or as they face an uncertain future.  A section of the exhibition shows Survivors too, those who have come through illness, or the bereavement process, and are living again.

Click on the link below to see our video and to hear more and to donate to this important work. 

 

http://www.wefund.co.uk/project/graceful-death-film

 ***************************************************************************

14 Year Old Son may be large and hungry but he can be as ill as any of us.  Poor kid, he struggles with his hearing, his tinnitus and his balance (sometimes).  So now with tonsillitis his ears are giving him extra discomfort and on top of that he has lost his hearing aid again.  So, a week in bed for him, lots of medicine and ice cream and all he really wants are Nick Nack crisps.  14 Year Old Son had such a high temperature the other night that he hallucinated and got me up in the early hours because the house was full of unexploded bombs.  He propelled me downstairs at 12.30am to find them and it was a little while before I could get him into a tight embrace and tell him to stop.  He is about 6' 2" and quite big, and was really not interested in chatting while the bombs were not diffused.  I got very tough before making him sit with me and holding him with a vice like Mummy Grip (only desparate mummys can do this) until 2am when I got him back into bed.  "Sleep well my Son," I said tenderly while giving him more paracetamol, "let us just recap - we will not explode before dawn, and mummy has got all the mines out from under the sink."

So I have cancelled a few things this week.  The house will fill up again though, as on Wednesday my teeny weeny little friend Fatema comes to rest and rethink.  She is just under 5' tall, very, very lively and pretty and very good at Kids.  And on Thursday my Cousin's Cousin comes to stay.  She comes every year, and is also teeny and dainty and beautiful.   Both are in their 20s and both are going to sleep on sofas.  Why?  Because my Burly Pole is staying on a bit and will have the spare room.  We like the Burly Pole, and say Horay when we get the chance.  Dear Daughter may come home on Saturday and she will have to sleep with me.  Except Alan may be coming too so maybe we will have to all sleep in a big jumble like hamsters.  

I have been making earrings too.  I love making earrings.  I love playing with all the beads and selecting colours and shapes and designs and thinking Wow!  Someone will look Fab with these.  And so they will.  I must remember to bring a mirror up to the Fairies and Angels and Earrings fund raising weekend where you will all be dying to try the earrings up to your lovely faces.  And don't forget I will be able to make up your own designs in front of you too, so there is no reason at all to do the shopping, visit Aunty, catch up on sleep or go on holiday for that weekend.  No reason at all.  And you can commission your own Fairy or Angel, that is worth cancelling your trip to Honolulu for.  

And now, I am going to do a Long Red Pointy Pepper Fairy.  And after her, some Angels.  I will do a Kick Ass Angel but I don't know quite how yet.  I have had lots of requests to do her, so obviously the Fairies will be nice and veggie, and the Angels tough as old boots.  Onwards and upwards.  (No there won't be a Tonsillitis Fairy. But there may be a Kick Tonsillitis Ass Angel.) 

Just Painted A Tomato Fairy.

www.antoniarolls.co.uk for my website
www.jesusonthetube.co.uk for the best known of my images, Jesus on the Tube Train being ignored by everyone
www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for the A Graceful Death exhibition, paintings from the end of life

Just Painted A Tomato Fairy.  

 Angels, Earrings, Fairies and Cakes by

Antonia Rolls 

Shopping Angel

You are warmly invited to a weekend sale of Paintings, Prints and Handmade Earrings

Wine and Tea and Cakes 

                      

Fairy Cakes and Flowers                                   Fat Ladies Diving

                                                                                       

         

             

  

                                                              Blue Teapot Fairy

Saturday May 21 10am - 9 pm to

 Sunday May 22 10am - 9 pm

   at

127 Worple Road, Wimbledon SW20

   New Beginnings Angel   

 Sale in aid of the A Graceful Death projects, the Film and the Exhibition.

 www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com for more information

I aim to have this sale of Angels and Fairies and fun things while also displaying the latest information about the A Graceful Death exhibition and film.  The weekend is about having fun with all of you, with colour, fun, wit and humour, alongside the serious business of raising funds for the A Graceful Death exhibition and film.  

***********************************************************************
 

The A Graceful Death Film Project -

Making a film of the effect an exhibition of paintings of death and the end of life (A Graceful Death, paintings from the end of life) has on those who are involved in the works, and those who come to experience them at exhibitions.   Showing how the exhibition is created and broadcast, and hearing what those who love it say, and those who don't love it, say.  And very significantly, showing how it feels to paint a sitter as they approach the end of their life, or as they face an uncertain future.  A section of the exhibition shows Survivors too, those who have come through illness, or the bereavement process, and are living again.

Click on the link below to see our video and to hear more and to donate to this important work. 

 

http://www.wefund.co.uk/project/graceful-death-film

 ***************************************************************************

I just painted a Tomato Fairy.  The Tomato Fairy has been joined by a Banana Fairy, a Cup Cake Fairy and I am now doing a Daisy Fairy.  I am going to the fridge this evening to see what other vegetables and fruit I have to made into Fairies.  As is the case with doing one little picture of a Fairy, I now see Fairies everywhere.  A Garden Gate Fairy!  No, what about a Mobile Phone Fairy!   Hang on, a Lasagne Fairy (while making Lasagne for 14 Year Old son who is still hungry) and then, when that is done, an Early Night Fairy.

Soon I will get onto the Angels.  I am feeling a bit militant about stuff so I may do a Get Knotted Angel, a Stop Cold Calling Me I Don't Want To Buy Anything Angel, an I'm Not Doing The Washing Up Angel.  But because I am basically very nice, that won't go on for long.  I will end up doing Angels of Love, Angels of Peace, Angels of All The Housework Is Done and so on.

What have I been doing?  Why are my blogs so far and few between?  Life, is the answer to both of those questions.  Life.  I have been doing Life (nicely, not in a maximum security jail).  I have much less time than before, and I seem to have much less to say.  At the moment, I am a bit of a bland getter-of-things-done-whether-it-works-or-not.  I have not much humour in me, and I have not much zap.  I don't sparkle and I look serious.  I wear my glasses and frown with a pursing of my lips.  I wear sensible shoes and long skirts made of corduroy, I look like a rather focused librarian.  Recently, there has been much organising to do.  I have been sitting at the computer drowning under emails, AGD correspondence, making contacts, writing - this is the most draining thing of all because it is not likely to come to anything - writing my Arts Council Application for funding.  Each question needs me to write a small book, and there are about a thousand questions.  However, I did it and sent it off yesterday.  If nothing else, I have gathered my thoughts around where AGD will be going and how to do it.  It is all a mystery.  Today, I wonder if I can remember any of the crucial points that I made in the application forms.  I feel serious, brown and plodding.  And not very interesting at all.  Plod plod plod.

But Lo!  Have I not been a plodding caterpillar before?  Have I not emerged time and time again as a butterfly?  Then this is what I will expect.  Sometime this week, when I am not expecting it, I will find my wings and sit on a flower.  Sorted.

My home is filled again.  There is a delightful Polish Fellow staying, as there seems to be a tradition of Excellent Poles staying here.  The Polish Grandmother who spoke not a word of English was the first.  Then there was the Silent Pole - a lovely man we put up now and again, who never said a word nor was seen except as a shadow as he left the house, or disappeared round a corner, or closed his bedroom door.  He was very interesting and polite when cornered sometimes on the stairs and made to talk, and I believe he slept on  his bed not in it.  We love having him to stay, we like to bet on whether he exists or not, or whether he is going to eat anything during his entire stay.  Now, the room is occupied by a jolly articulate young fellow, who speaks perfect English and is as polite and jolly as you could wish for.  He is staying for just a week, unless he decides to stay longer and since I am very flexible, I am delighted whatever he decides.  A young and burly Polish fellow this, he looks like a farmer and is only 23.  How he will fit into an arty house where the owner regularly turns into a butterfly and sits on flowers, drinks tea and looks serious in her glasses, is going to be interesting.  Of course, 14 Year Old Son is very happy with him.  14 Year Old Son could never catch the Silent Pole for a chat, and there was no use talking to the Polish Grandmother as she only spoke Polish.  

 This afternoon I go to the local Hospice to start my volunteering work.  This is what I want to do, and I have no idea where I am going with it.  I think I just want to work with the dying.  How, I don't know.  It is so important and I do the A Graceful Death work, but I still know nothing.  Let us see.  The Hospice will be a very good teacher.

Hey Ho, time it marcheth on.  It is time to take off my glasses and smile a bit.  I don't think the Hospice patients would like a serious brown plodding caterpillar to mingle amongst them.  Time to shake off the shackles of being serious and bland and start to hum a merry little tune and check out the most suitable flowers.