http://www.antoniarolls.co.uk/ for my website
http://www.jesusonthetube.co.uk/ for my other website
http://www.agracefuldeath.blogspot.com/ for the A Graceful Death exhibition, paintings from the end of a life
So! Taking Both The High and the Low Roads And Buying New Underwear.
Here is the High Road. My Norweigian Artist Friend sent it to me and it seems to me that I should Walk Down This Road. Over the hill, over the mountains, is the Answer. This is obviously taken in the snow so being me, I would have to wait till the sun was shining and it was hot to find the Answer.
Today, before we get on to the Underwear, let us talk about Roads.
Would you like to walk down the road in the picture above? What is it about Roads and Highways and Pathways that excite us (me) so much? I looked at this picture and felt that if I could just go and walk along it, and over the top and into the mountains, I would be Happy. I showed it to the Wonderful Olivia who lives and writes books near here, and she offered to walk it with me. We both thought we would get a bit of Supreme Knowledge beyond where the road runs out. Actually, we would have to do it together because when the road ran out, and it was just a road after all, and we had invested it with more meaning than it could possible have, we would need to turn round and come back again and we may feel a little foolish for thinking God Lived Beyond The Mountains, and in those circumstances it is good to have company. There is something in this picture that offers solace and escape from all the mundane things of life. It is as if by magic, just by even wanting to walk this road, life will be more exciting and the hopelessly time comsuming nitty gritty of our every day lives will sort themselves out without any more input from us.
Now for the Low Road.
The Low Road. I am torn between which to travel first. This is where I think Particle Physics may be an inspiration. From what I can gather in my Arty Head, particles can be in two places at once. Oh if I was a Particle my life would be, in this case, easier.
This photo is a road from Aritst Friend's house in Norway. And once again it is snowy but this one looks so pretty that I may just not worry about the cold. I have been in the Norweigian cold and snow before. And I still live. But I don't have Answers.
The point of these Roads is that they are there to represent Change. Movement. Leaving Something Behind and Finding Something New. I look at these roads, both of which inspire me to hurtle down them with an expectant expression on my eager face, and think Ha! There is the Answer! To walk from where I am and to travel along those mysterious roads into a) mountains b) woods means that Everything Will Be Ok!
But, this lovely Norweigian Wood Worker and Nature Loving Friend, although he is very In Tune With Nature, is also delightfully bonkers and I have a picture of him too with a chicken on his head.
Next we go on to the Underwear. No Artist or Writer (Olivia) can go on any magical mystery walks to find The Meaning of Life without new fancy Bras and Knickers. Yes. But leaving Olivia out of this, as she was not with me at the time, what does a Woman Who Is Needing Cheering Up do? Why, she goes to Marks and Spencers and gets a whole load of Vivid Pink Bras, with Push Up Bits so she can try and look like Dolly Parton! She gets red and white spotty bras with matching knickers (but the knickers have to go up to her tummy button because after 3 children she has no tummy to speak of, just a sort of empty wobbly space where there once were muscles, or a function of some sort.) Oh! Marks and Spencers made me very happy and now I sit in my studio with the red and white spotty knickers up to my tummy button, and hidden deep beneath my paint splattered old extra large boiler suit, I have a Neon Pink Push Up Bra that makes me feel that if I was run over today and the paramedics had to see if my heart was still beating, they would have a nice surprise and say to each other "I wish all our patients would go to Marks and Spencers before being run over. It makes such a difference, and shows respect and foresight in that we paramedics, we have our aesthetic sides too. "
Bearing that in mind, Onwards and Upwards takes on a whole new meaning. But Onwards and Upwards it
Me and the The Muppet Overlord waiting for Enlightenment and Knowledge in our kitchen before deciding which Road To Take.
I saw this on another forum today. They were talking about football but it seems right for here. I've put it in quotation marks so you can see.ReplyDelete
"The games and scripts we play out in our lives are effectively journeys. They give us meaning and their execution thus becomes an end in itself.
The pleasure of anticipation
The nice thing about playing games is the anticipation that they bring. If the game has an attractive outcome, then we look forward to the pleasant end of the game. If the game itself is unpleasant, then we look forward to the relief of reducing the pain.
The fear of disappointment
We travel in the game with a hope that, when it completes, our expectation of success will be completed. We also may also fear that the glorious ending that we are anticipating will not be that wonderful. Comparing the possibility of a positive outcome with the more powerful and devastating thought of not achieving our goals leads us away from completion and into an endless journey of fantastic hope.
The fear of emptiness
Another fear that can strike us is the potential nothingness of a completed journey. As we travel, we gain meaning, both in the intended goal and the interpretation of daily events. When we look forward to the journey's end, we may see an end to this daily meaning in our lives.
The end of a journey can be like a death, where we may mourn what is past and can never be again. The fear of this alone is enough to keep many of us on the road for much longer than necessary."
I have similar feelings about mountains. When I was staying a Lake Como a few years ago I spent hours staring at these beautiful misty distant mountains. I really wanted to go to them, but at the same time I knew that when I got there the beautiful sight I could see wouldn't be where I arrived. The beautiful, mysterious mountains, when seen up close, are rocky and prosaic. Staring at them and longing to be there was both compulsive and deeply unsatisfying. I found it a little depressing in the end.
Anyway, that's my existentialist thought for the day.