Tuesday 17 February 2009

Here are a Few Thoughts on the Theme of Betrayal.

It is a general view on the nature of Betrayal and you should be sure I am fine and this is just thinking.

For a News and Views from an Artist's Studio, we are really into and stretching the Views part. I will follow with News later.

If you feel betrayed, on what scale do you measure it? The feeling of betrayal is very consuming and doesn't have to have much logic to it. Does it bring up some unresolved personal issue that is waiting to show itself in the guise of betrayal, which needs attention and assumes the mantle of betrayal? How many variations are there. There is the small which makes you take a deep breath. There is the medium which makes you angry and upset and you either have it out with your betrayer or you walk away. There is the big which makes you disbelieve it and wonder at your own worth that you should have made such a betrayal possible. That one is hard to deal with because it is difficult to find words to make sense of your panic. The betrayer has done the betraying. You are trying to make sense of it in your world and your understanding of theirs.

Feeling betrayed takes away my strength. It makes me doubt my intelligence. Most betrayals
make me want to withdraw. I would rather not deal with it, it means I have to understand both my reaction and the facts of the act of betrayal. That is hard, it may be very hard to hear that the betrayal is a result of circumstances that include your behaviour too.

News from the studio is that it is exciting to paint here. I have a bunch of Valentines flowers on my table and that makes me so happy. My Jesus on the Tube is coming along. Today, friends, today, I shall paint a few faces on the Ross painting. Beneath the Pergola which is now not an insoluble problem. As is life. Not an insoluble problem. Today's nugget is that I am addicted to tea with black molasses sugar in it. It answers all the needs a cup of tea with black molasses sugar can address.

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